Remembering...

I guess we all remember where we were that morning. I was doing daycare. Mike was getting ready to go van shopping. The phone rang, and my brother said "Put the TV on". Who would have ever thought those 4 words would change everything...

Mike and I stood there stunned. Alone, and yet with so many fellow Americans standing in front of televisions across the nation. We were stunned together. So early on, no one knew what was going on. Was it terroism? Was it an all scale attack? Or was this some tragic accident?

Then the news that it was definately two planes. Then the news of the 3rd. And then the 4th. Oh, God... no.

We stood and our guts wrenched as the second tower crumbled in front of our eyes.

You could feel the panic in the air.

I was 4 months pregnant for Caleb, and I remember being scared to death at what may be coming. As talk of war mounted in the days and weeks that followed, I wanted to wrap my teenage son up in his baby blanket, and pretend he wasn't on the brink of being a man.

Those were scary days. But those scary days evolved into a patriotism that enveloped all of us. It was such an amazing experience of gathering and strength... rebuilding. And reaching past our own fears and mournings to help those who had lost so much more...

It's been nine years. In too many ways those early patriotic days have faded. In too many ways, we have forgotten. As my daughter and I watched the news reflecting on the 9/11 attacks, I asked her if they had talked about it at school. "No". was her simple answer. In these nine years, my children have never had a classroom discussion or lesson about 9/11,  neither in elementary nor highschool...

For me, Caleb is a constant reminder  that the losses go so far beyond that day. There were many pregnant women on September 11th who lost their husbands. Now their children are Caleb's age. Children who never knew their daddies. And all I can do is hug my boy, and pray that all those who gave so much more that day are as ok as possible.

And I can't pass by a firefighter without wanting to hug him...