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Thursday, August 18, 2011

Letting go...

From my oldest son... to my youngest, little Jake. We took the four youngest kiddos to an amusement park yesterday. Hannah and Caleb went with dad and our friends to the "thrill rides" section, while my friend and I took all of our youngest to "kiddie land". Our three girls enjoyed the wonderful mini rides, but Jake was quite depressed just sitting in his stroller watching the slightly older kids have such colorful adventures. When they all boarded the mini merry-go-round, he started chanting "PWEAZ... PWEAZ" (which of course is "please, please" in toddler language).

Because it was later at night, kiddie land was all but abandoned, and the ride attendants could give special attention to the little ones in their temporary care. The girl operating the merry-go-round assured me that the little ones are seatbelted very tight, and that Jake couldn't wriggle his way out. HHHhhmmm... (she had never met Jake) Ok. We tried the little sleigh. It had a flat seat, sides, and didn't move on it's own. Jacob was beyond delighted. He rode around and around with the biggest smile on his face. But then his riding partner (3+ years his senior) decided she was brave enough to try a horse. Ugh... That meant Jake too, had decided he was too big for this "baby" sleigh.

The girl again assured me that the children were strapped onto the horses so securely that they couldn't possibly fall off. Me... being me... had to evaluate the worst possible scenario. "What if" the plastic buckle did come undone... "what if"? I suppose the worst scenario would be that he would be thrown from the horse as the merry-go-round spun, fall into the inner circle, slide down under the platform, and perhaps get caught up in mechanisms, or in the least get dragged between the platform and the dirt below.... death was possible, if not probable in such a case.

So, of course... I let him ride.

My husband says that makes me a good mommy. I'm still trying to work that out.

All I know is Jake had the time of his life. He rode that merry-go-round about a dozen times. He also rode the bouncy cars, the fire truck, and the boats. But that merry-go-round with the "horshes" was his favorite. I feel like I "let go" of my baby a little bit last night. You'd think I'd be an ol' pro considering I've done this 5 times before. But somehow it feels like I'm treading new waters every time. Still, my heart bubbles over thinking of watching my "baby" transform into a "cowboy" right in front of my eyes...

Now, the fact that my 11 year old daughter rode the new "untamed" rollercoaster is something I'm still trying to work through. I like that our kids are mostly fearless. It's just hard to keep my eyes open sometimes :)


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